It's a common wish for a number of people to die as a famous man. They feel that the more number of people shed tears at their death, the more secure would their path to heaven be. They dream of having a large meeting of morose faces condoling their own death. And what more to say, they even secretly wish the nation to mourn their death. Thoughts like " when you were born, you wept and the world rejoiced; make sure that when you leave, the world weeps and you rejoice" can be found in any "great sayings" book. But sorrily, I love to differ from the general lot on this very notion.
I intend to keep a low profile, and would definitely love to leave this world in utter silence. I must clarify here that I don't mean living a hermit's life and dying a hermit's death. I will live in this world and with this world till my soul finds a new guise. And more importantly, I will keep working towards my objectives till I stay here. But throughout the journey, I would like to be among the people whose lives I intend to ameliorate. Thus the low profile. And being constantly aware of the fact that it would be HIM doing things through my hands, I will evade the ever so dangerous 'ego', keeping a safe distance from it. In the very end, I would like to die a death which wouldn't pain anyone. For those who wouldnt be knowing me, the event wouldn't make a difference; but even for my acquaintances too, my death would only be a space time event. For, the people who will be knowing me, will also be knowing the deathlessness in my death, or shall I say, the deathlessness in death.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
LAXO'S LIFE - A short story
Fortune liked it this way, I guess. After about an year of separation, I happened to ram into Lakka this morning. The whole incident took me by surprise. And it happened in a flicker..... beating my senses that laid fumbling for a proper response.
It was last april. We were a nice little group. Lakka senior, Khadim bhai, Sree, Lakka, Bata and me, Laxo lived happily together. We shared the same rack, and that made us not just neighbours, but very close friends too. The long chats we shared about our future, predicting the other's destiny as if we were the Almighty, the way Sree used to get jealous when people praised Bata, the way we all laughed at Bata when his admirer would find some fault with him, or with his own pocket, and drop him back, the way we prayed together for our eternal friendship, despite knowing that any potential buyer will end our camaraderie in no time, the grim face Lakka senior used to wear at the sight of fat customers.....all the memoirs flashed before my eyes within seconds. Alas, I couldnt even recognise Lakka and it was him who waved at me. And by the time I came out of that reverie, Lakka had disappeared. Cursed be fate.
I was the first one to leave the troop. So, I had no trace of any of my lost friends. A rich man happened to choose me, when I had least expected. I always used to think that any sensible man would go for the likes of Bata or Sree, and thus never bothered to think beyond the rack. But, my destiny was written in a different ink. Before I could say sayonara to them, I was put into a small carton. Darkness all around, I was left alone with my tears. The very next day, my owner took me out of the box and placed me along with some very worn out seniors. Their condition spoke volumes about the barbarism of my gentleman owner. However, I was proved wrong. My man was a sophisticated fellow in all respects. The way he cared for me, I could only thank my stars.
Since the day I was sold, I have seen enough of the polished world. I have been on aeroplanes, I have seen many high-level meetings, I have been to a number of formal parties..... But despite a so-called royal life, I have missed something. Something that I realised only today after that short meeting with Lakka. Although he started his worldly sojourn after me, he had seen more of life than I had. My world has been nothing more than a cocooned stretch. I never alighted from the tiled floors, never walked on the soil..... never did the shine on me fade. And Lakka, he seemed to have lived his life to the fullest. The wrinkles and the whitened skin said loudly about his rugged life. I had never run into others the way Lakka rammed into me today. Probably, my master was a bit out of his shell today, or was it that Lakka made his debut on the tiles today. Before I could regain my senses after the accident, annoyed as i was, I saw the familiar face of Lakka waving his laces shouting "O jesus, is that you Laxo.... you look so young..... Pardon me, I din intend to hit ya, its jus that I've been cursed with this ruffian master."
The incident left a longing in me, to run aimlessly on the grass, on the soil, to walk through mud, to drench myself. How unfair? I have been through a life imprisonment, jailed to live my owner's life, forced to wear the 'civilized' tag.
I am not sure whether Lakka would be enjoying his life, free of qualms. But then, destiny by nature, is cruel. It has only pains and spasms to offer. And in my case, it has been gruesomely hostile, snatching my freedom.Cursed be fate. Cursed be fate.
Now, I am desperately waiting for someone who will steal me from some temple and will let me live as Lakka, the rugged shoe.
It was last april. We were a nice little group. Lakka senior, Khadim bhai, Sree, Lakka, Bata and me, Laxo lived happily together. We shared the same rack, and that made us not just neighbours, but very close friends too. The long chats we shared about our future, predicting the other's destiny as if we were the Almighty, the way Sree used to get jealous when people praised Bata, the way we all laughed at Bata when his admirer would find some fault with him, or with his own pocket, and drop him back, the way we prayed together for our eternal friendship, despite knowing that any potential buyer will end our camaraderie in no time, the grim face Lakka senior used to wear at the sight of fat customers.....all the memoirs flashed before my eyes within seconds. Alas, I couldnt even recognise Lakka and it was him who waved at me. And by the time I came out of that reverie, Lakka had disappeared. Cursed be fate.
I was the first one to leave the troop. So, I had no trace of any of my lost friends. A rich man happened to choose me, when I had least expected. I always used to think that any sensible man would go for the likes of Bata or Sree, and thus never bothered to think beyond the rack. But, my destiny was written in a different ink. Before I could say sayonara to them, I was put into a small carton. Darkness all around, I was left alone with my tears. The very next day, my owner took me out of the box and placed me along with some very worn out seniors. Their condition spoke volumes about the barbarism of my gentleman owner. However, I was proved wrong. My man was a sophisticated fellow in all respects. The way he cared for me, I could only thank my stars.
Since the day I was sold, I have seen enough of the polished world. I have been on aeroplanes, I have seen many high-level meetings, I have been to a number of formal parties..... But despite a so-called royal life, I have missed something. Something that I realised only today after that short meeting with Lakka. Although he started his worldly sojourn after me, he had seen more of life than I had. My world has been nothing more than a cocooned stretch. I never alighted from the tiled floors, never walked on the soil..... never did the shine on me fade. And Lakka, he seemed to have lived his life to the fullest. The wrinkles and the whitened skin said loudly about his rugged life. I had never run into others the way Lakka rammed into me today. Probably, my master was a bit out of his shell today, or was it that Lakka made his debut on the tiles today. Before I could regain my senses after the accident, annoyed as i was, I saw the familiar face of Lakka waving his laces shouting "O jesus, is that you Laxo.... you look so young..... Pardon me, I din intend to hit ya, its jus that I've been cursed with this ruffian master."
The incident left a longing in me, to run aimlessly on the grass, on the soil, to walk through mud, to drench myself. How unfair? I have been through a life imprisonment, jailed to live my owner's life, forced to wear the 'civilized' tag.
I am not sure whether Lakka would be enjoying his life, free of qualms. But then, destiny by nature, is cruel. It has only pains and spasms to offer. And in my case, it has been gruesomely hostile, snatching my freedom.Cursed be fate. Cursed be fate.
Now, I am desperately waiting for someone who will steal me from some temple and will let me live as Lakka, the rugged shoe.
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